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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29239950">Iridescent</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/palepinkpores/pseuds/palepinkpores'>palepinkpores</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Light [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Fall (TV 2013), The X-Files</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bisexual Dana Scully, F/F, Kid Fic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 10:08:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,644</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29239950</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/palepinkpores/pseuds/palepinkpores</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Stella, Scully and their two little girls.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Stella Gibson/Dana Scully</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Light [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1920700</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>80</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Sunrise</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Slowly, with Anna tucked into one arm and carrying a steaming cup of coffee in her opposite hand, Scully made her way out of the back door, across the patio, down the three flagged steps and towards the tent that was pitched in the middle of the lawn. The sun had just started to rise and the six week old baby was grizzling hungrily, becoming impatient with her mother.</p><p>Upon arriving at the zipped mouth of the tent, Scully bent and carefully set the coffee down before unzipping the flap as quietly as she could and kneeling down in the little entrance. She smiled at the sight in front of her: Stella fast asleep in her sleeping bag, with Grace nestled right into her side, her own sleeping bag abandoned.</p><p>“Hi, Mama,” Grace whispered. “Mummy’s still asleep.”</p><p>The toddler pressed her finger to her lips, a serious look on her face, emphasising that under no circumstances should her mother be woken. Scully nodded, equally as serious, and set a wriggly Anna down onto Grace’s sleeping bag. She lifted the coffee into the tent and found a nice, flat part of its floor to rest the cup.</p><p>“Did you sleep well, baby?” Scully whispered, shuffling over to where she’d placed Anna and retrieved her from the comfort of the nylon.</p><p>Grace nodded, but a big yawn gave her away and Scully chuckled lightly, guessing that her partner and eldest daughter had both had a rough night. Stella had been promising Grace for weeks that they could camp out for a full night in the back garden and had taken a half day from work the previous day to buy and put up the tent and arrange their two sleeping bags.</p><p>With watery eyes, Grace watched as Scully lifted her t-shirt and unclasped her nursing bra, bringing her milk-swollen breast to the newborn’s eager mouth.</p><p>“She’s hungry,” Grace observed.</p><p>“Mmm,” Scully smiled. “She’s always hungry lately, I think she’s having a growth spurt.”</p><p>Grace giggled and stretched her legs out diagonally, unintentionally kicking Stella out of her slumber. The blonde grunted lightly as she began to stir, frowning at the morning light that had begun to permeate the thin walls around them. She pulled Grace tighter into her side, nuzzling her little blonde head of hair, inhaling her sleepy scent as she slowly began to wake.</p><p>Grace twisted and turned herself to face Stella.</p><p>“Mama and Anna are here,” she whispered in her ear.</p><p>“Oh?” Stella mumbled, blinking her eyes open.</p><p>Immediately, her face lit up.</p><p>“Hi you two,” she smiled. “We’ve missed you.”</p><p>“I bet you have,” Scully nodded. “How did you both sleep?”</p><p>“In a word: terribly.”</p><p>Scully chuckled when Stella ran her hand through her bedraggled hair. She unzipped her sleeping bag, allowing her to sit up and stretch her aching back.</p><p>“The ground’s so hard,” she grumbled.</p><p>“Mmm,” Scully hummed, swapping Anna over to her other breast. “That coffee’s yours.”</p><p>She gestured towards the steaming cup and Stella lunged for it gratefully.</p><p>“Here, Gracie,” Scully said, reaching into the pocket of her hoodie and pulling out a sippy cup half-filled with orange juice.</p><p>“Bring it to me and I’ll open the spout for you,” Stella offered, her eyes closing in bliss as she took her first sip of the black Americano Scully had made for her. “That coffee machine is the <em>best</em> purchase we’ve ever made.”</p><p>Stella sat up straighter and wrapped her free arm around Grace, who began to drink her juice contentedly and rested her head on her left breast.</p><p>Soon enough, Stella had finished her coffee, Grace her juice and Anna her milk.</p><p>“Swap?” Stella offered.</p><p>Scully passed over Anna along with a muslin and, after a bit of cooing and a quick peppering of kisses to her face, Stella began to burp the baby with a determined air. Meanwhile, Grace had abandoned her cup in the depths of the sleeping bag and had crawled into Scully’s lap, enjoying the extra attention she was getting from her. It was clear that both women had missed their children after just a single night apart.</p><p>“What day is it?” Grace asked.</p><p>“It’s Saturday,” Scully replied.</p><p>Grace nodded and reached up to stroke Scully’s cheek with her fingers, starting at her jaw, moving up her cheekbone, over her brow, down her nose and over her lips. The little girl repeated this circle of caresses over and over again, mimicking the sure-fire method that both her mothers used to sooth her to sleep. On her third journey around her face, Scully caught Grace’s palm with a kiss and the girl squealed with delight. Her mother opened her arms and allowed her to flop into her chest, squeezing her as tightly as she could, beginning to rock her gently from side to side.</p><p>They settled into a sleepy, sated rhythm: Scully swaying with Grace plastered to her front, the gentle sound of Stella patting a milk-drunk Anna on her back. All eyes were beginning to get even heavier and Scully could feel herself beginning to nod off whilst sitting up, until a deep, long belch punctured the contented silence that had drifted over them.</p><p>Grace’s head shot up and she chortled loudly, whipping her head around just in time to watch Anna produce a second then a third burp, each one louder than the last.</p><p>“<em>Anna!</em>” Grace howled delightedly, tipping her head back as she burst into peels of uncontrollable laughter.</p><p>Scully smirked, covering her eyes with her hand momentarily, before looking up at a very smug Stella.</p><p>“I always get the best burps from the baby, don’t I Gracie?”</p><p>Grace nodded enthusiastically, launching herself onto her back, her legs up in Scully’s face, still laughing delightedly.</p><p>Stella rolled her eyes but then tilted her head sympathetically when she noticed Scully tenderly transferring her weight from one buttock to the other.</p><p>“Let’s go in,” Stella suggested, knowing that Scully was still sore from the birth and sitting on the ground in the middle of their garden at seven o’clock in the morning wasn’t doing anything for her.</p><p>Scully calmed Grace with a gentle rub of her back and a knowing look and encouraged her to her feet. The rambunctious almost three year old scurried out and onto the grass and made for the neighbours’ cat as it unwittingly hopped from the fence and landed on their soil, unaware that Grace had spotted him.</p><p>Stella carried Anna out of the tent after Scully and hummed appreciatively when she was able to straighten her back, no longer having to crawl, stoop or crouch in the confined space. She propped their now sleeping newborn on her shoulder and watched Scully prise Kilo the cat from Grace’s enthusiastic clutches, before expertly convincing her to leave him alone and go with them into the house for breakfast with only a handful of words.</p><p>“What do you want for breakfast, Gracie?” Stella asked. “Cornflakes? Cheerios? Toast?”</p><p>“Mmm,” the little girl pondered as she was lifted into her booster seat at the table by Scully. “Cheerios.”</p><p>“<em>Please</em>,” Scully prompted.</p><p>“Please Mummy.”</p><p>“Okay,” Stella smiled, pouring and placing a cup of milk down in front her with one hand, the baby still curled up on her shoulder. “Dana, why don’t you sit? I’ll do that.”</p><p>Scully had begun to fill the sink with soapy water, intending to clear the pile of plates, mugs, glasses, cups and cutlery that had accumulated on the kitchen counter over the last twenty four hours. The dishwasher had needed emptying three days earlier and she still hadn’t managed to do it. Since Stella had returned to work after her parental leave, almost a month ago, Scully had found it impossible to keep on top of the house as well as caring for a newborn and a toddler.</p><p>Stella saw her shoulders tense and her head dip in defeat and glanced down at Anna, who was snoozing soundly with her little hand on her neck. She eased the baby onto her chest and carried her into the hall where she gently lowered her into her pram, sighing with relief when her eyes remained closed. Stella returned to the kitchen, mindfully keeping the door open, and saw that Scully remained where she was, by the sink and looking out of the window and into the garden.</p><p>Wordlessly, she crossed the room, picking up a few fallen Cheerios from the tiles as Grace munched away happily, joined Scully and covered her hand with her own.</p><p>“Cheerios?” she offered, opening her palm to reveal four discarded hoops.</p><p>Scully smiled wearily and shook her head.</p><p>“I made some overnight oats.”</p><p>“That sounds good, go and sit down and we’ll both have a bowl.”</p><p>Scully took a seat next to Grace and listened to her ramble about various animals they saw at the zoo the weekend prior, her recount complete with flailing arms and sound effects.</p><p>Stella decanted the oats into two large bowls and began to cut up a banana and a variety of berries to go on top with a drizzle of honey each. She scooped what was left of the fruit into a small, plastic bowl for Grace and served the three bowls at the table before brewing the kettle and making a cup of tea for herself and Scully. Stella set the steaming mug down in front of Scully and pressed two reassuring kisses into her forehead before plopping into the chair opposite.</p><p>Grace had begun to rally for a second visit to the zoo that very weekend, matching each of Scully’s counter suggestions with one of her own. The adults’ eyes met across the table and they smiled discreetly when Grace began to insist Anna also wanted to go to the zoo and she knew because she had told her.</p><p>“You’re very headstrong, little girl,” Scully said fondly, pushing her daughter’s fruit towards her encouragingly. “But we need to tidy the house this weekend, it’s a mess.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I don't really know what I'm doing with this to be honest but I'm thinking it might be a series of one-shots rather than something continuous. I've got nothing else up my sleeve for this one for now as my priority is to update Aureate as regularly as I can; I'm thinking it'll be something I dip in and out of whenever inspiration strikes. I just hope this isn't too confusing now that I've started to tell their story before and after having kids all at the same time!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Specular</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“That’s it… that’s it! Kick, kick, kick, kick!” Stella enthused. “Keep kicking, don’t stop!”</p><p>She momentarily squeezed her eyes shut against the tsunami of pool water that washed over Grace’s head and into her face as she pulled her along by her elbows. The little girl kicked determinedly- each leg fully leaving the water and soaking anyone who swum too close to them.</p><p>It was Sunday morning and they were at their local pool for the ‘Family Fun Session’ from eight to nine o’clock. Adults and their young children paddled and squealed around them, jumping tentatively from the pool side and bobbing along the surface of the water on giant inflatables and floats.</p><p>Stella slowed down as another child shot through the water behind her and then stopped completely when they reached the side of the pool. She pulled Grace into her front and supported her bottom as she rested her head against her mother’s chest, panting.</p><p>“Was that hard work, darling?” Stella cooed affectionately.</p><p>Grace nodded, burrowing into her ribcage.</p><p>The end of the session was growing near, with the large clock on the wall reading five to nine, prompting most of the other occupants of the pool to start gathering their children and make their way into the changing rooms.</p><p>“Float and then shower?” Stella suggested their usual cool-down routine.</p><p>“Yeah!” Grace cheered, suddenly rejuvenated after the exhaustion of her sprint across the pool.</p><p>“Okay then,” Stella smiled, moving her away from her body and encouraging her to tip her head back, spread out her arms and push her bottom up to the surface of the water. “Just like we practiced… take deep, slow breaths… good girl.”</p><p>It took a minute or so to help Grace keep herself afloat, but soon enough she was flat on her back, with her eyes closed, bobbing up and down with the gentle ripples of the pool water. With one eye on her daughter, Stella mirrored Grace’s posture and floated along next to her, chuckling quietly to herself at the comical sight of Grace’s bright orange armbands buoyant and larger than the toddler’s head, keeping her confidently above the water.</p><p>“Well done, Gracie,” Stella soothed, easing her upright again and encouraging her to wrap her little arms around her neck.</p><p>Stella pulled her slowly to the side and lifted Grace out of the water, where the little girl stood at a safe distance away from the edge and watched her mother climb out and join her on the pool side. Stella persuaded Grace’s arm bands off and immediately deflated them just as the lifeguard began to ask the few remaining stragglers to vacate the pool so that they could prepare for the next session of the day. Hand in hand, they walked towards the changing rooms.</p><p>“You’re so sensible now,” Stella gently praised. “Such a big girl.”</p><p>Grace beamed up at her, pride radiating from her delicate features; she loved nothing more than pleasing her parents. Stella smiled right back, their first trip to the swimming pool dancing around in her memory. Grace: shrieking and over excited, somehow wriggling out of her swimming costume and streaking completely naked towards the changing rooms, watched by an entire audience of other swimmers. Stella: flustered and embarrassed, chasing after her, picking up her discarded swimwear and willing the rambunctious toddler not to slip and hit her head. They had come a long way in a year.</p><p>Grace plucked at the hem of Stella’s swimming costume, enjoying the satisfying smacking sound of the wet polyester against her thigh. She waited patiently while Stella took their shampoo and conditioner from her gym bag, before securing their locker once more and gently removing the little hand which had crept inside her swimming costume and was groping it’s way curiously towards her stomach.</p><p>“Here,” Stella said, handing her the shampoo bottle to carry as they made their way to the showers.</p><p>Stella guided Grace towards the far side of the busy shower room and began to untangle her blonde waves from her ponytail, thankful for the fact that her daughter wasn’t hair sore, while they waited for one of the showers to become available.</p><p>When it was their turn, Stella twisted the handle of the warm water and began to rinse Grace’s hair before rubbing in the strawberry scented shampoo. Grace stood patiently, knowing the drill, with her head tipped back and her palm pressed over her eyes to avoid any stray suds irritating them. Stella then applied a generous amount of conditioner and allowed Grace to partake in one of her favourite parts of their weekly visits to the swimming pool: standing completely submerged under the warm stream of shower water.</p><p>Stella quickly washed and conditioned her own hair and rinsed the chlorine off her body, then took Grace by the hand and headed back to their locker. She dried her little girl off briskly with their larger towel before wrapping her in her grey hooded towel, complete with cat ears. She pulled her bag over her shoulder and expertly nabbed them a changing cubicle.</p><p>“I like it here, Mummy,” Grace told her.</p><p>Stella kissed her on her forehead and began to peel Grace’s swimming costume off her shivering frame, quickly drying her off properly and dressing her, before lifting her to sit on the little bench while she undressed herself.</p><p>“Mummy?” Grace asked.</p><p>“Yes, Gracie.”</p><p>“Why does Mama have a hair there and we don’t?”</p><p>Stella’s head shot up and she met her daughter’s curious, blue eyes, still just as blue as the day she was born.</p><p>“Hair where, baby?” Stella ventured, though she had a pretty good idea exactly where Grace was referring to.</p><p>“There,” Grace said simply, pointing at Stella’s vulva as she stood completely nude in front of her.</p><p>“Well…” Stella began, mentally forming an appropriate response. “When you’re an adult, like Mama and I, you can choose if you want hair there or not.”</p><p>“Can I choose?”</p><p>“Not yet, but one day you’ll grow hair and then you can choose.”</p><p>“Oh,” Grace said thoughtfully, pondering her future decision.</p><p>She watched Stella dry herself and dress all while uncharacteristically silent and deep in thought. Stella held her breath slightly in anticipation of what Grace may ask her next.</p><p>Her next question struck when they were walking to the car, their hair damp and cooling in the morning breeze.</p><p>“Why does Mama want hair?” she wondered.</p><p>“I don’t know,” Stella replied honestly. “There’s nothing wrong with having hair on your private parts, it protects your body from germs, so it’s actually quite good.”</p><p>Grace suddenly gasped, startling Stella as she unlocked the car.</p><p>“You should get hair, Mummy!” Grace exclaimed. “Germs are bad!”</p><p>Stella laughed, lifting Grace into the back of the car and buckling her into her car seat, dropping her gym bag into the footwell.</p><p>“As long as you wash yourself and stay clean like we do, there’s nothing to worry about. I promise,” she added when Grace looked at her sceptically. “Don’t worry about it.”</p><p>Stella kissed her on the end of her nose and handed her the cup of water she left in the car for Grace, for after swimming. She popped the spout up and left her to drink thoughtfully, looking out of the window as her mother drove them home.</p><p>When they pulled into the drive, they saw Scully standing in the window, rocking baby Anna, drowsy after another night of almost hourly feeds and very little sleep.</p><p>“Mama!” Grace squealed, waving excitedly when she spotted Scully.</p><p>Scully grinned and blew a kiss for both of them as Stella unloaded the car and they made their way inside.</p><p>“Hi!” Scully exclaimed, meeting them in the hall. “You both smell like chlorine.”</p><p>She carefully bent and gave Grace a smattering of kisses and listened as she began to tell her all about how Stella had bagged her favourite green float to play on before any of the other parents had even slid into the pool. Stella kissed Scully tenderly on her cheek and eagerly received their sleeping baby, rubbing the curve of her little fuzzy nose with her finger, watching as the newborn unconsciously wrinkled her face at the chlorinated scent of her mother’s skin.</p><p>“Gracie had a very interesting question for me while I was getting dressed after swimming,” Stella murmured when they had set her up with some colouring at the kitchen table.</p><p>“Yeah?” Scully prompted, curiously raising an eyebrow. “More interesting than the never-ending torrent of questions about my breasts and breastfeeding that I’ve been answering for the last month and a half?”</p><p>“She wanted to know why you choose to keep your pubic hair and why she and I have none.”</p><p>“Oh wow,” Scully deadpanned. “She notices <em>everything</em>.”</p><p>“Everything,” Stella agreed, nodding. “And she soaks it all up like a rosy-cheeked little sponge.”</p><p>Scully smirked.</p><p>“What did you tell her?”</p><p>“The truth, of course,” Stella said, kissing the crown of Anna’s head and leaning back against the sink.</p><p>“I think that’s the best way to go,” Scully agreed. “Though I do always wonder what excruciatingly personal piece of information she’ll want to know about me next.”</p><p>“Mmm,” Stella hummed. “I wonder where she gets it from…”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I miss swimming and I miss my mum. </p><p>Writing Kid Fic is something I now enjoy doing, apparently.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Night</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The surface of the coffee table in the living room was hidden by a blanket of papers, not a single millimetre of the oak was visible. The lights were dimmed and classical music played softly in the background while Stella typed away at her laptop, cross-legged on the rug-covered floorboards and intermittently sipping a cup of black coffee. She unconsciously hummed along to Mozart whenever she took a break to read over her work. Next to her, rocking every so slowly in her baby swing, was Anna, who blinked curiously up at her and watched her mother’s every move.</p><p>Stella saved her document and leaned back against the couch with a satisfied sigh, picking up her cup and taking a long drink. She glanced over at Anna.</p><p>“<em>How</em> are you still awake?” she whispered, bemused. “Go to sleep.”</p><p>Anna blinked and her unbelievably long eyelashes tickled her plump cheeks. Stella drained her coffee and abandoned the empty cup, before crawling over to the swing that rocked her youngest daughter from side to side. Slowly, slowly.</p><p>“It’s so late my little love,” she said, kissing her cotton covered stomach.</p><p>At seven weeks old, Anna was still very dainty. Though she gained weight every week and was no cause for concern, Stella knew that it was something that upset Scully and made her feel inadequate; she hadn’t taken to breastfeeding as easily as she had with William or as easily as Stella did with Grace. No matter how many times Stella pointed out that Grace had also been a smaller baby, it didn’t seem to make a difference.</p><p>They’d had Anna examined for a tongue tie when she was two weeks old and hadn’t regained her lost birth weight, but she was found to be physically perfect. There also wasn’t a problem with Scully’s milk supply. Stella ensured she always had a bottle of water within reaching distance and cooked them nutritiously rich meals six nights a week, with their celebratory ‘made it through another week’ takeaway every Friday night as a treat. In Stella’s opinion, Scully was exhausted and overwhelmed. Her recovery after Anna’s birth was taking longer and, though Scully blamed herself for that as well, Stella knew it was because of the exertion of running around after Grace. That was why Stella had taken to working late at home, in their living room with their newborn at her side and Scully sleeping upstairs. Anything to give her a break.</p><p>Stella glanced down at her watch and realised it was already approaching one o’clock in the morning. Her alarm would be going off in just over six hours, that is if the shock of Grace’s cold feet as she crawled into their bed didn’t wake her first.</p><p>“I think it’s time to call it a night, don’t you?” Stella hummed.</p><p>She turned off the rocking motion of the swing, unclipped the harness and eased Anna out and onto her shoulder. Carefully she stood and began to sway with her in time with the music, waiting patiently as the baby’s eyelid’s got heavier and heavier and her cheek sunk further and further into Stella’s clavicle.</p><p>Completely immersed in what she was doing, Stella hadn’t heard the click of the door handle, hadn’t realised that Scully had come downstairs and was standing a few feet away, watching her partner cradle their daughter by the light of a single lamp.</p><p>“You’re like the baby whisperer,” Scully muttered drowsily.</p><p>Stella jumped, unintentionally jostling Anna.</p><p>“<em>Jesus</em>, Dana!” she gasped. “Is she asleep?”</p><p>Scully joined them standing in the bay window and peered down at Anna.</p><p>“Just, I think,” she said, looking at Stella apologetically.</p><p>Securing Anna with one hand, she opened her other arm to Scully, encouraging her to lean into her side and soon they were all swaying together.</p><p>“Why are you up?” Stella asked.</p><p>“Couldn’t sleep,” Scully grumbled. “I can’t believe you haven’t been to bed yet; you were up most of last night with her too.”</p><p>“Mmm, you have them both all day, every day, it’s the least I can do.”</p><p>Scully nuzzled into Stella’s work blouse, inhaling her perfume and the tinge of perspiration that came with a long day at the office and an evening of juggling two small children.</p><p>“You smell amazing,” Scully whispered.</p><p>“I absolutely stink,” Stella chuckled. “I can smell myself.”</p><p>“I love the way you smell, all the time.”</p><p>Scully pulled back, keeping her arms in their place around her partner’s waist and kissed her lightly. She glanced over at the mess of documents.</p><p>“I’ve finished that report so I can justify having an extra hour in bed in the morning.”</p><p>“That sounds promising…for me,” Scully tempted with a raise of her eyebrows.</p><p>“Really,” Stella smiled slowly. “Do you feel…?”</p><p>“Yes, I feel,” Scully grinned.</p><p>She leaned in and kissed Stella again, keeping hold of her bottom lip between her own as they parted, sucking it lightly.</p><p>They hadn’t been intimate at all since Anna was born and, as Scully seemed to have no interest in having any kind of sex with her, Stella hadn’t brought it up. She knew they would discuss it at a time that was right for both of them and it appeared that time was upon them.</p><p>“I’ll take her and tidy all of this up,” Scully said. “So you can shower and we can have some extra time together in the morning.”</p><p>Stella raised her eyebrows as she passed their stirring baby over. If it wasn’t for her own tiredness and the way in which Scully dropped heavily back into the couch cushions, lifting her pyjama top to feed Anna to sleep, Stella would suggest they showered together. </p><p>She looked in on Grace on her way to the bedroom and, thankfully, found her to be undisturbed by the fact that the rest of the family were up. Walking down the corridor and into their room, Stella undressed and threw everything into the laundry basket in the ensuite, ready to wash another long day away.</p><p>“<em>Fuck</em>,” she scoffed when she looked at herself in the mirror.</p><p>The makeup she had been wearing since six o’clock the previous morning had mostly slid from her face, just a smudge of mascara under each eye remained. The curls that she spent time working into her hair each day had well and truly fallen out and her roots had started to become greasy. Her eyes were bloodshot and heavy and she knew that both she and Scully were the physical embodiments of the stereotypical parents to a newborn trope.</p><p>Stella showered quickly and towel dried her hair as thoroughly as she could, before slathering night cream onto her face and dressing in some mismatched sleep ware. As she re-entered the bedroom to find Scully flat out in their bed and Anna sprawled on her back in her cot, she acknowledged that she was a far cry from the woman she was four years earlier, but she had gained so much.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Glistening</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Scully’s eyes slowly opened and she lay with her head deep in the softness of her pillow, listening. Mere seconds later, her baby started to whimper in the little cot at her side.</p><p>It happened every time. Day or night, Scully would always wake just before Anna started to fuss. It was as if her body could sense it, was always on high alert and ready for any sound, no matter how small, that would tell her the newborn needed her. It used to happen with William, too, though she never slept easily when she had him. She had always been vigilant to the danger that loomed over them both and often managed to get by on three hours sleep a night at the most.</p><p>Nowadays, she was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. The pure exhaustion of the night feeds and the long days at home with two children under four completely wiped her out. The warm body next to her provided an endless flow of comfort and security and she knew they were in it together, always, with Stella  ready to take the reins when Scully was too drained to keep hold by herself.</p><p>“Mmm,” she sleepily hummed. “I’m coming.”</p><p>She sat up and checked her alarm clock, blinking twice upon seeing it was only just past seven o’clock on Wednesday evening. Stella had urged her to have a quick nap as soon as she walked through the door earlier than she normally did and realised how exhausted Scully was. The quick nap had turned into a two hour long slumber and she felt groggy and disorientated, too hot under the duvet, as she heard her daughter’s cries swiftly reach a crescendo.</p><p>Scully rolled out of bed and slid her feet into her slippers before scooping the red, wailing bundle from the cot. She bounced her lightly, her lips pressed into her downy little head as she made her way out of the bedroom and across the landing where she could hear the occasional splash among the peals of laughter coming from Grace. It was bath time but it didn’t sound like anyone was winding down for the night.</p><p>Pressing her pinky finger between Anna’s hungry lips, she nudged the door open with her shoulder.</p><p>“Who’s making all this noise?” she questioned in mock outrage.</p><p>“Mama!” Grace squealed, clearly overexcited by the fact that Stella had joined her in the bath.</p><p>“Did we wake you?” Stella asked, concerned.</p><p>She pulled Grace into her lap, keeping her still and attempting to calm her in her firm hold.</p><p>“No,” Scully smiled, patting Anna’s bottom. “This looks fun!”</p><p>Grace beamed.</p><p>“It’s so much fun, Mama!” she informed her. “Mummy’s being the shark and I’m the fish!”</p><p>“<em>Really?</em>” Scully smirked with her signature eyebrow raise.</p><p>“Really,” Stella deadpanned.</p><p>Both women erupted into a fit of giggles while Grace looked between them both, her face emulating that of a lottery winner.</p><p>“You didn’t wake me up,” Scully sighed, sitting down on the closed toilet seat, beginning to unfasten her bra. “Little Miss is hungry, of course.”</p><p>Grace tipped her tub of animals into the clear bathwater while Stella watched Scully struggle to find a comfortable position to breastfeed in. Anna had become impatiently grizzly.</p><p>“Why don’t you feed her in here? It’s nice and warm,” Stella suggested.</p><p>“Mama, yes!” Grace gasped. “It would be the funnest!”</p><p>“It would be the <em>most fun</em>,” Scully corrected gently.</p><p>She repositioned Anna with no joy and sighed in defeat.</p><p>“Why not?” she shrugged.</p><p>Stella smiled and nodded at her, pulling Grace back between her legs, encouraging her to help her move all the plastic toys to their side of the bath while Scully undressed Anna.</p><p>“Here,” Stella offered, holding out her hands for the baby.</p><p>Scully passed her over and watched as she settled on Stella’s bare chest, immediately lulled by the warmth of the water and the skin to skin contact she was well accustomed to with both her mothers. While Scully began to pull the pyjamas she still hadn’t managed to change out of from the night before, Stella showed Grace how to carefully pour a small, green beaker of water over the newborn’s back.</p><p>“She’s more bumpy,” Grace observed, running her finger up and down Anna’s chubby thighs.</p><p>“They’re her rolls,” Stella told her. “Mama’s feeding her up so she’s getting nice and chubby now.”</p><p>“She’s sleepy,” Grace whispered, pressing her pointer finger to her lips.</p><p>“She likes how the water feels, it’s soothing her.”</p><p>Stella could feel the soft bristle of Anna’s eyelashes against the slope of her breast.</p><p>“Are you going to give her your boobs?” Grace whispered.</p><p>“No, Gracie, we’ve talked about this. It’s just Mama who has milk to feed Anna.”</p><p>“Because I drunk all yours.”</p><p>“Yes, you did,” Stella smirked.</p><p>She glanced over at Scully, who shook her head and stifled a chuff of laughter.</p><p>A week earlier, Grace had turned three and started nursery, just for two days each week, where she immediately shared everything she knew about breastfeeding and Scully’s nipple cream, much to the amusement of her teachers and the bewilderment of the other toddlers. “They were impressed with how enthusiastic she was about the topic,” Scully had told Stella upon her return from work that evening.</p><p>“A little bit closer.”</p><p>Stella urged Grace nearer, where she rested her cheek against Anna’s warm back, and Stella bent her knees to frame both girls as Scully climbed into the bath opposite them.</p><p>“Let Mama feed the baby,” Stella intercepted Grace’s plans to launch herself at Scully and passed Anna over Grace’s head into Scully’s waiting hands.</p><p>“That’s better,” Scully cooed.</p><p>She smiled down at the baby as she settled her on the slope of her eight weeks postpartum stomach, where she immediately latched and began to suckle hungrily while staring up at Scully, mesmerised.</p><p>“Here,” Stella said.</p><p>She leant over to the towel rail and plucked a freshly washed hand towel from the warm pipes. She submerged it in the bath water and placed it carefully over Anna’s bare body.</p><p>“Good idea,” Scully said, tucking her in.</p><p>“Anna won’t get cold now,” Stella explained to Grace.</p><p>Scully slid further down into the bath and rested her head back against the tiled wall behind her, closing her eyes and tucking her legs under Stella’s.</p><p>“Try to relax,” Stella soothed, rubbing her calves tenderly while Grace played happily with a toy dolphin between them.</p><p>“I didn’t ask before, how was your day?” Scully said.</p><p>“Oh, it was fine, this is better.”</p><p>Scully secured Anna in one arm and, with her eyes still shut, reached out her free hand to Stella as if in thanks. Stella caught hold of the ends of her fingers and leant down to kiss her knuckles.</p><p>“The three of you are always better,” she said as Scully opened her tired eyes and looked at her gratefully.</p><p>“Can we do this every night?” Grace asked, completely oblivious to the moment her parents were sharing.</p><p>“Maybe not every night,” Scully said. “But I think we should make it more of a regular occurrence.”</p><p>“I agree,” Stella said, squeezing Scully’s hand.</p><p>“Nearly every night,” Grace persisted.</p><p>“We’ll see,” Stella pacified.</p><p>“Gracie, which of your animals live just in the water and not the land?” Scully asked in an attempt to distract her.</p><p>Grace immediately began rattle off a list of marine animals, while Scully closed her eyes once more and Stella began to wash the toddler’s hair.</p><p>One of their friends was an Early Years teacher and had assured them with great confidence that Grace was lightyears ahead of many other children her age, both academically and socially. Her speech was impeccable for a just turned three year old and her curiosity and intrigue in relation to the world around her was impressive to say the least. Scully and Stella immediately declined her offer to arrange an assessment for Grace to see just how advanced she actually was and merely attributed Grace’s acceleration to limited screen time, lots of reading together and plenty of conversations about anything and everything the little girl enquired about.</p><p>Stella smiled to herself, listening to Grace’s second list, this time of land animals, and Scully’s gentle encouragement and praise while she ran her fingers through their eldest’s hair before rinsing the conditioner out.</p><p>“All finished,” Stella said, wrapping her arms around Grace’s chest and kissing her cheek.</p><p>“Mama’s turn!” Grace decided, watching Scully transfer Anna onto her other breast.</p><p>“Not tonight, Gracie,” Scully said. “I’ll wash mine tomorrow, maybe.”</p><p>“Why not tonight?” Stella asked. “Slide forward and I’ll climb behind you.”</p><p>“Oh, Stel, no. I’m too tired.”</p><p>“So just let me pamper you. All you have to do is sit there.”</p><p>Without a word, Scully held out her free hand and huffed as Stella pulled her up to sitting.</p><p>“Let’s get rid of some of these,” Stella said, scooping a few handfuls of Grace’s toys back into the plastic tub they were stored in.</p><p>She stepped out of the bath and scooted Grace over to the far end, while Scully slid into the middle and Stella stepped in behind her.</p><p>“How’s that?” she asked, carefully coiling her legs around Scully and kissing her shoulder.</p><p>“Nice,” Scully breathed as she felt Stella begin to massage her shoulders.</p><p>Stella looked down at Anna who was almost completely asleep with Scully’s nipple loosely hanging from her mouth.</p><p>“I’ll be so gentle,” Stella promised, moving her hands down to rub at Scully’s hips, carefully tracing the indented streaks that had joined the smattering she already had from William.</p><p>She lightly encouraged Scully to tip her head back and began to rinse her hair, getting the angle just right to avoid the water spilling over her shoulders and onto Anna while Grace played happily. She massaged the shampoo right down to Scully’s roots and relished in the soft sighs she was releasing as Stella worked in just the right amount of pressure.</p><p>It was when she was applying the conditioner that she felt Scully flinch.</p><p>“Of course,” Scully sighed, looking down and laughing.</p><p>“Mama! Anna’s <em>weeing</em> on you!”</p><p>Grace jumped up in horror and attempted to move as far away from her still sleeping sister as she possibly could.</p><p>“Stand still, Grace,” Scully instructed.</p><p>She took hold of Grace’s forearm and steadied her before she even had the chance to slip.</p><p>“Looks like bath time’s over,” Stella laughed, kissing Scully behind her ear.</p><p>She stood and stepped out of the bath before lifting Grace out and wrapping her in a towel. She then took Anna from Scully and began to dry her off.</p><p>“Why don’t you have a shower?” she suggested, watching as Scully pulled the plug out and the yellowing water started to empty.</p><p>Scully sighed and nodded her agreement, rolling her eyes with a knowing smile.</p><p>“It was good while it lasted,” she said.</p><p>“Anna needs a nappy in the bath next time,” Grace complained, clearly unhappy that the fun was over.</p><p>“It wasn’t her fault,” Stella said kindly. “Anna doesn’t know when she needs to go like we do.”</p><p>Grace continued her grumbling as she padded ahead, leading their small procession to her mothers’ bedroom where Stella dressed both girls for bed, carefully combed Grace’s hair and helped her to brush her teeth. She was sitting up in bed reading through a file from her latest case when Scully joined her, peering into Anna’s cot before slipping in next to Stella.</p><p>“That <em>was</em> fun,” Scully said, sliding towards her.</p><p>“A nice treat,” Stella agreed.</p><p>Scully rested her head on Stella’s shoulder, closing her eyes upon feeling her leaning in.</p><p>“Let’s just hope she doesn’t share too much at nursery tomorrow.”</p><p>“I think we both know she definitely will.”</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Flicker</h2></a>
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    <p>“Shit!” Stella cursed as she dropped the steaming pan into the sink with a clang, bringing the fresh burn on her middle finger to her mouth. “Shit, shit, <em>shit!</em>”</p><p>“Mummy! That word again!” a small voice admonished from behind her.</p><p>Stella jumped and whipped around.</p><p>“Grace, you’re supposed to be in bed,” she sighed.</p><p>“M’not tired,” the little girl insisted.</p><p>“You should be,” Stella told her, taking her by the hand and leading her out of the kitchen, through the baby gate and up the stairs. “It’s past your bedtime and you’ve run Mama ragged all day.”</p><p>“Let’s get some water,” Grace tried one of her regular avoidance techniques.</p><p>“You’ve had your milk,” Stella told her, smirking discreetly at her tact. “And that’ll be enough to get you through to the morning.”</p><p>They arrived at Grace’s bedroom and the door creaked slightly as Stella pushed it open. The nightlight glowed gently in the corner and Grace frowned, displeased, as her mother patted her mattress, encouraging her to settle beneath the covers. The three year old did so begrudgingly and fixed her mother with her harshest stare, which Stella firmly ignored.</p><p>“Good night, darling,” she kissed her forehead and smoothed her hair back. “I’ll see you in the morning.”</p><p>Without another word, she rose from her crouch and left the door ajar so a small spill of light from the landing seeped into the room.</p><p>Stella sighed wearily upon hearing Anna stir from their bedroom, hoping that they didn’t have another night of walking Grace back to bed every few hours on top of dealing with their colicky baby.</p><p>“Not you too,” she cooed as she approached the cot. “Oh you stink, little girl!”</p><p>Anna grunted uncomfortably as she squirmed to fill her nappy. Stella rubbed her tummy until she had finished before spreading the changing mat over their freshly laundered bedding and lifting the sobbing baby into her arms.</p><p>“No surprises,” Stella told her, laying her flat and unfastening her sleepsuit. “These sheets are clean on for Mama later… oh wow! Look at all of this!”</p><p>Anna wailed as Stella disposed of her full nappy, cleaned her up and dressed her in a fresh sleepsuit. She cradled her against her shoulder and begun to rock her slowly.</p><p>“Are you hungry? Ready for your first bottle?” Stella whispered.</p><p>She carried the reddening little bundle downstairs and selected a bag of freshly expressed breastmilk from the freezer, submerging it in a jug of warm water.</p><p>“Shh, I know,” Stella soothed. “It won’t be long.”</p><p>She rocked Anna gently until she could see that her daughter’s evening snack was ready. Stella shook the bag to check for separation and then quickly deposited Anna into her pram, where she began to shriek desperately at the loss of contact, while Stella poured the milk into a bottle and tested the temperature against her wrist.</p><p>“Okay, honey, I know,” she whispered.</p><p>She lifted Anna back into her arms, sat back in a chair at the kitchen table and put the teat of the bottle against the baby’s lips for the first time.</p><p>“What’s this?” Stella murmured, watching as her youngest explored the unfamiliar texture for the first time, her little pink tongue lapping hungrily. “It’s still Mama’s milk, but we can do this together now and give her a break.”</p><p>After a moment of hesitation, Anna latched on and began to gulp down the milk.</p><p>Stella smiled despite the pang of guilt she felt in her chest.</p><p>***</p><p>A few evenings prior, Scully had agreed to start expressing some of her milk as, at eight and a half weeks old, Anna had developed what they suspected to be colic and hardly slept longer than an hour at a time, depending on skin to skin and breastfeeding to lull her back to sleep. After four full nights of next to no sleep, Scully had broken down on Stella as soon as she stepped through the door after work and it was that night they decided something had to change.</p><p>Stella had immediately phoned her superior and feigned a sickness bug, guaranteeing herself forty eight hours at home, before bathing and putting both of their daughters to bed, and pouring Scully a glass of red wine.</p><p>“I don’t want to hear it,” she interrupted as Scully opened her mouth to protest. “You need this. One glass isn’t going to make a difference.”</p><p>Scully sipped her wine and watched as Stella cleaned and tided the kitchen, before heating up a ready meal for two she had found in the depths of their freezer. Slowly, Scully felt her shoulders relax and the tight knot of tension loosen in her chest.</p><p>Stella placed a steaming plate of lasagne in front of her and poured herself a drink.</p><p>“This can’t go on,” Stella told her after they had eaten. “You need to let me help you more, let someone else in.”</p><p>Scully nodded, her eyes immediately pooling with tears.</p><p>“You’re exhausted and none of this is your fault. You need to accept that, Dana.”</p><p>Scully sniffed then choked on a sob.</p><p>“Here,” Stella soothed, sliding off her chair and onto her knees at Scully’s feet.</p><p>Scully allowed Stella to take her hands, felt her run her thumbs over her knuckles as she tried to prevent her tears from coming.</p><p>“You can cry,” Stella said. “I think you need to.”</p><p>“I don’t know why I can’t do it,” Scully snivelled.</p><p>“Do what?”</p><p>Stella tilted her head.</p><p>“All of this,” her eyes travelled in a wide circle around the room. “Keep it together like you did. You made it look so easy while this is one of the <em>hardest</em> things I’ve ever done in my life.”</p><p>“I didn’t find it easy,” Stella reminded her. “But you’ve got two of them. I just had Grace to deal with and once she was happy, so was I. She was easier than Anna as well.”</p><p>“It’s not Anna’s fault.”</p><p>“No, it’s not, but it’s not yours either. All babies are different, and our circumstances are different this time too.”</p><p>“I even coped better with <em>William</em> and everything that came along with him.”</p><p>“You also had your mother,” Stella said. “She’s so far away now so you don’t have that immediate support from her, she can’t be here for you in the same way this time.”</p><p>Scully shook her head and pulled one of her hands from Stella’s, running it across her forehead.</p><p>“I’m so tired.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>Stella moved to stand over her and immediately pulled her to rest against her torso, head against her belly, and began to run her fingers through Scully’s greasy hair.</p><p>“Why don’t we speak to Rachel? See if she can start coming again?” Stella suggested, referring to their childminder.</p><p>Scully hadn’t seen Rachel since the week after Anna was born. She had hurried to their house in the early hours of the morning to take care of Grace while Stella and Scully were at the hospital for the birth and then visited them with flowers seven days later. They had told her in the months leading up to Anna’s birth that they would only need her to continue with her regular hours once Scully went back to work, something she happily supported as she transitioned to care for the children of another family.</p><p>“What will she think?” Scully sniffed. “She’ll know that I can’t cope.”</p><p>“She will <em>know</em> that you’re giving our daughters the world but that it is hard work and it’s perfectly normal to have a little help, especially as we don’t have family close.”</p><p>“Mmm,” Scully hummed leaning heavily into Stella’s stomach. “I hope she doesn’t like her new family better than she likes us.”</p><p>“Impossible,” Stella smirked. “I’ll give her a ring tomorrow and make sure she doesn’t.”</p><p>***</p><p>Two days after Scully’s emotional collapse, a Friday, Stella decided to make the most of her second sick day and give Scully some time to herself. She had booked her a hair appointment at her regular salon for six o’clock that evening, which gave Stella time to get the children settled and to bed before Scully arrived home afterwards. It also allowed her to prepare the three course meal for the two of them that she had been thinking about surprising her with since midweek.</p><p>It was just after eight o’clock when Stella heard Scully’s key in the lock followed by the thunk of their heavy front door. She glanced over at the kitchen table where their starter, a small platter of artisan breads, balsamic vinegar and olive oil, was prepared and another bottle of red wine and glasses were poised.</p><p>“Hey,” she heard the fatigue heavy in Scully’s voice as she kicked off her shoes and shrugged off her jacket in the hall.</p><p>Stella said nothing but smiled at her when she made her way through.</p><p>“Oh,” Scully stood in the doorway. “What’s all this?”</p><p>“Dinner,” Stella smiled. “For us, no kids.”</p><p>She had even moved the pram and Grace’s booster seat into the utility room.</p><p>“Not that I don’t completely adore them, but I think we need a little time just for ourselves.”</p><p>The room was dimly lit; Stella had been working by candlelight and had pulled the blinds on the window down. There was no music, she couldn’t decide what to play, but her phone was plugged into the speakers just in case Scully wanted it.</p><p>“You didn’t have to do this; takeout would have been fine.”</p><p>“Fine isn’t good enough.”</p><p>Stella made her way over to her partner and untucked her hair from behind her ears.</p><p>“I’m glad you kept the length,” she said, moving her hand to caress her cheek. “I like the colour too.”</p><p>She had requested a deeper auburn tone this time.</p><p>“I found more greys yesterday so I thought darker would be better… but, thinking about it now, maybe I should have gone lighter…”</p><p>“It’s perfect, I love it.”</p><p>Stella kissed her in the centre of her forehead.</p><p>“Why don’t you sit down and I’ll get you a drink?” Stella suggested, leading Scully to the table.</p><p>“Are they…?”</p><p>“-Sleeping,” Stella finished, handing her the baby monitor which showed a black and white image of their newborn fast asleep. “Well, Anna is, Grace didn’t go down without a little resistance. Hopefully she will be by now though.”</p><p>Stella filled Scully’s glass and then her own.</p><p>“Cheers,” she said with a clink.</p><p>They began to eat and chatted lightly about the upcoming weekend, casually planning a picnic at the park if the weather turned out to be as warm as it was predicted to be.</p><p>Scully finished her first glass of wine and her gaze travelled over Stella’s shoulder and to the kitchen counter.</p><p>“Is that… did she take a bottle?”</p><p>Her voice was small.</p><p>“Yeah,” Stella said guiltily. “We did agree we’d give it a try.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>“And it doesn’t mean you can’t breastfeed as well.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>“She wouldn’t have been able to wait for you to get back.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>Scully’s bottom lip began to tremble and Stella reached across the table and took her hand.</p><p>“You are an amazing mum, Dana,” she said. “Nothing will ever replace you in the eyes of our girls but you can’t be at your best for them if you don’t rest and take some time for yourself.”</p><p>“Mmm,” Scully sniffed, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. “Did she like it?”</p><p>“She was hesitant at first but took to it in the end and now she’s fast asleep and you can enjoy our meal.”</p><p>Scully nodded.</p><p>“Thank you,” she said, squeezing Stella’s hand.</p><p>“Don’t mention it,” Stella smiled.</p><p>She gathered their clean plates and the empty platter and took them over to the sink. She stacked the dishwasher and checked the potatoes.</p><p>“Salmon, new potatoes and salad,” Stella said. “Are you ready for it now or shall we wait.”</p><p>She jumped as she felt a pair of arms coiling themselves around her waist.</p><p>“Let’s have it now, I’m starving,” Scully murmured, kissing her behind the ear.</p><p>The wine had clearly helped her to relax.</p><p>“This is nice, I’ve missed you,” Stella said.</p><p>“I know, I’m sorry.”</p><p>“You’ve got nothing to be sorry about.”</p><p>“…What about tonight?” Scully abruptly asked.</p><p>“Really?” Stella checked, grinning.</p><p>“I want to try again if you’re not too tired.”</p><p>“I’m not too tired…”</p><p>Over two weeks ago they had tried to have sex for the first time since Scully had been heavily pregnant with Anna, waking up an hour earlier than they usually did so they could take it slowly. It hadn’t gone well and had ended in tears on Scully’s part. Stella had stroked her hair while she cried into her stomach. It hadn’t been anything to do with pain, in fact pain hadn’t even been a factor, but Scully wasn’t ready. She had been tense and nervous despite the elongated period of foreplay Stella had purposely luxuriated her with and had immediately seized up as soon as Stella began to enter her. Then, she had insisted that she would be fine at home with the kids and sent Stella off to work as usual. They hadn’t spoken of it since.</p><p>Stella turned and kissed Scully fully on the mouth, only to yelp as she was pushed back against the grill. She immediately sprung forwards and banged into Scully in a bid not to catch fire courtesy of the burning hob that cooked their salmon.</p><p>“Sorry,” Scully gasped.</p><p>Stella steered them away from the hob and allowed Scully to press her into the countertop instead and they giggled as their lips met. She grabbed Scully’s bottom in an attempt to draw her in closer still and Scully sighed, the epitome of contentment as she relaxed completely, feeling slightly tipsy from her second drink in over a year.</p><p>“It’s going to burn,” Stella mumbled.</p><p>“Mmm?”</p><p>Scully’s eyes remained closed as she continued to kiss her.</p><p>“The salmon…”</p><p>“Oh,” she breathed, tilting her head to the side.</p><p>Their noses were still touching.</p><p>“Let’s save this for later,” Stella said. “You’re starving, remember?”</p><p>Reluctantly, Scully stepped back and allowed Stella to return to her place at the stove. She topped up their glasses and set the table with new cutlery while Stella served up before they sat down to eat.</p><p>“I think I’m going to need to pump,” Scully told her. “Before we… you know…”</p><p>Stella nodded.</p><p>“Only if you’re uncomfortable,” she said, chewing. “You know the milk situation doesn’t bother me in the slightest, in fact, it tastes quite nice. I can see why Anna’s a fan.”</p><p>Scully scoffed.</p><p>“You tasted it?”</p><p>“Mmm, while I was testing the bottle earlier. It tastes sweet.”</p><p>Scully raised an eyebrow at her.</p><p>“She’ll need another feed before we go to bed.”</p><p>“I’ll do it while you pump,” Stella said. “And I’ll pull her cot away from your side. I don’t think she’ll wake up but, you know…”</p><p>Stella chuckled.</p><p>“She won’t have a clue what we’re doing, she’ll probably sleep straight through it.”</p><p>“I know… but you know how I feel about it.”</p><p>“I remember,” Scully smiled fondly.</p><p>Stella had been exactly the same when Grace was a newborn and they’d make love while she was still in their bedroom with them at night. At first, they had tried having their tiny firstborn sleep in her pram on the landing outside their closed door, but Stella hadn’t liked that either and said she felt too far away. It had taken some time and a fair bit of manoeuvring of the cot before Stella approved of the distance.</p><p>“You’ll have to be quiet,” Stella teased.</p><p>“<em>Me?</em>” Scully scoffed. “I thought we agreed that you’re the loud one.”</p><p>Just as Stella had opened her mouth to retort, they heard the tell-tale whimpers coming from the baby monitor.</p><p>Scully smiled.</p><p>“I’ll get her,” she said.</p><p>Though it had been nice to get away for a few hours by herself, she had missed Anna terribly.</p><p>Stella moved their plates from the table and took the chocolate puddings she had bought the day before from their hiding place at the back of the cupboard, speared the lids and placed them in the microwave. She tentatively took a bag of milk from the freezer and filled a jug with water but before she could do anything else, Scully had returned with Anna and her feeding cushion.</p><p>“You can leave that,” Scully said, sitting down and wrapping the cushion around her front. “I’ll feed her.”</p><p>Stella nodded and put the items away again while Scully positioned the baby, and she began to feed hungrily.</p><p>“This way I won’t have to pump… and I’ve really missed her this evening.”</p><p>“She’s missed you too,” Stella smiled, serving the heated puddings and placing them down in their places along with a jug of cream in the centre of the table.</p><p>Scully nodded when Stella offered to pour her cream for her and immediately tucked into the soft, gooey sponge. She had become an expert at eating one handed.</p><p>They were halfway through their dessert when she appeared in the doorway, pale against the darkness of the hallway behind her.</p><p>“I had a bad dream,” she wept.</p><p>Her thumb inched its way towards her mouth, a self-comforting habit they knew she would eventually grow out of.</p><p>“Come here, darling,” Stella sighed, pushing her chair back and opening her arms.</p><p>Grace wandered over and slid into Stella’s lap, burying her clammy face into her neck.</p><p>“Do you want to talk about it?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” Grace sniffed.</p><p>She turned and spotted the half-eaten bowl of chocolate pudding in front of her.</p><p>“Is it nice, Mama?” she asked Scully, suddenly perking up.</p><p>“It’s really nice, Gracie,” Scully replied.</p><p>Stella smirked and rolled her eyes from behind Grace’s blonde head.</p><p>“One spoonful,” Stella conceded. “Then we can have a cuddle and I’ll take you back to bed.”</p><p>“Can I stay with you tonight?” Grace tried, carefully licking all the chocolate from Stella’s spoon.</p><p>“No, sweetie,” Scully said softly. “You’re in your own bed now, aren’t you?”</p><p>“But Anna’s not.”</p><p>“Not yet, but she will be in a few months,” Scully reminded her, as she had to so frequently as of late. “You were with us until you were six months old and then you moved into your own room and that’s what we’re going to do with Anna so it’s fair.”</p><p>Grace said nothing and instead took a large scoop of Stella’s cake and opened her mouth as wide as she could to accommodate the portion.</p><p>Scully transferred Anna onto her other breast and Stella wiped Grace’s mouth, before turning her around to rest her head on her chest. The rocking commenced as the two women strived to get both children back to sleep as quickly as possible.</p><p>“Which bird is the biggest?” Grace’s muffled voice asked.</p><p>“No questions until the morning, it’s sleep time now,” Stella asserted.</p><p>Scully repressed her laughter at her partner’s response as well as the determination that burned in her eyes as she used every trick in the book to lull Grace off to sleep. Eventually, after a great deal of soothing, both of their daughters were asleep once again and settled back in their bed and cot.</p><p>“Right,” Stella beamed as Scully turned from Anna’s cot to face her. “I’ll go down and finish the kitchen and then I’m all yours.”</p><p>Scully took a deep breath.</p><p>“It’s okay,” Stella assured her, brushing her waist and planting a comforting kiss on her cheek as she passed her.</p><p>As soon as she was gone, Scully made her way into their bathroom and brushed her teeth. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and admired her hair. It was the longest she had kept it since she was a teenager, having always just assumed shorter hair was easier to maintain. Now, however, she could leave it to dry naturally after she washed it, with her slight auburn waves falling delicately down her back, and she didn’t have to worry about blow drying it. She liked the new colour, it made her look brighter and less like the dreary, drained shell of herself that she had become.</p><p>Scully jumped when she heard Stella return and begin to move things around in their bedroom. She quickly washed her face and then pulled her sweatshirt over her head, tossing it into the washing basket by the sink. Looking at reflection in her jeans and fitted tank top, she took a deep breath and left the bathroom.</p><p>Stella was sitting on the end of the bed, pulling off her slippers when Scully approached. She smiled and stood to meet her in the middle of the room.</p><p>“I feel like it’s our first time all over again,” Scully admitted, pulling at the hem of her top.</p><p>“Dana, you’re beautiful and I will tell you that for the rest of our lives if I have to, if it’ll take you that long to believe it,” Stella said. “If this still doesn’t feel right, then we can wait.”</p><p>“No, it feels right,” Scully nodded, taking Stella’s hand.</p><p>She glanced over at Anna who was sound asleep in her cot, which Stella had pulled against their wardrobe- the furthest point from their bed. Scully noticed this and laughed.</p><p>“Let’s get going before she wakes up,” Stella chuckled, rolling her eyes at her own neurosis and pulling her towards the bed.</p><p>They landed in a heap in the middle of the mattress, Scully on top and straddling Stella’s middle, while Stella pulled her down and kissed her hungrily.</p><p>“Did you change the sheets?” Scully asked.</p><p>The scent of their fabric softener wafted up at her as Stella unbuttoned both of their jeans.</p><p>“Mmm,” Stella replied, not really paying attention to anything but Scully’s body.</p><p>“Did you vacuum and dust in here too?”</p><p>Still on top of Stella, she had lifted her head and was looking around the bedroom at the tidiness of it all compared to how she’d left it earlier in the evening as she went for her appointment.</p><p>“Yes,” Stella sighed.</p><p>She lifted Scully’s top and pulled it up and over her head, tossing it to the floor before sitting up and moving her to sit in her lap. Stella cupped Scully’s breasts through her maternity bra and began to kiss her chest while Scully admired the gleaming windows.</p><p>“Dana,” Stella panted. “Can we talk about the cleaning another time? I want to make you come.”</p><p>“Sorry,” Scully smiled down at her. “I’m with you now.”</p><p>They kissed for a long while, gradually removing items of each other’s clothing until they were both naked and gasping beneath the covers. Stella rolled them so that Scully was on her back, her thighs parted with Stella between them.</p><p>“Shh,” Stella smirked as Scully’s sounds of pleasure steadily began to increase in volume.</p><p>“Come… here,” Scully gasped.</p><p>She reached down and caught Stella under her arm, before pulling her up so that she was lying directly on top of her. She raised her thigh and pressed it between Stella’s legs, grabbing her hip and encouraging her to grind against her as they kissed some more.</p><p>“Oh god, oh <em>god</em>…” Stella groaned. “That feels so good, Dana.”</p><p>“What does, Mummy?” Grace asked.</p><p>“Shit!” Scully hissed, lowering her leg with a thud and pulling the covers higher, covering Stella as she hastily tried to pull herself together. “Grace, what are you doing?”</p><p>“Mama, you swore too!”</p><p>Scully ignored her comment.</p><p>“Why are you not in bed?” she asked, her rising frustration evident in her tone.</p><p>“I’m scared,” Grace answered simply.</p><p>“Of what?”</p><p>“The dreams.”</p><p>Her eyes were wide and glassy as she stood by their bed, clutching her teddy bear and shivering in the night.</p><p>Scully softened and cupped her cheek in her palm.</p><p>“Why don’t you go and get a story?” Stella suggested, emerging at Scully’s side. “We can read it together and then maybe you can stay with us, just for tonight.”</p><p>Grace nodded, handing Scully her bear to take care of while she made her way back to her bedroom.</p><p>They shared a look and a pair of exasperated smiles.</p><p>“We’ll miss this,” Stella said, kissing Scully tenderly. “When they’re out all night and we can’t sleep for worrying, we’ll do anything to get this back.”</p><p>“I know,” Scully agreed. “I was just really ready for you.”</p><p>“We might have to get creative with our timing and location next time,” Stella said, getting out of bed and throwing their scattered clothes into the washing basket in the bathroom. “Maybe save the housework chats for another time.”</p><p>Scully chuckled, pulling a fresh set of pyjamas for each of them out of their drawers. Grace returned to find them half dressed.</p><p>“Why did you not have pyjamas on in bed?” she asked, frowning as she boosted herself up and under the covers.</p><p>“We hadn’t had time yet,” Scully told her.</p><p>“Mhmm,” Grace mused. “Why were you on top of Mama, Mummy?”</p><p>“I was looking for our pyjamas in the bed while Mama had a rest,” Stella promptly shot back while Scully concealed a smile behind her hand.</p><p>She climbed into bed next to Grace and tucked her under her arm.</p><p>“You needed a rest, didn’t you Mama?” Grace agreed, looking up at her. “You were so out of breath!”</p><p>“I was,” Scully’s voice wavered, slightly betraying her amusement. “It was a good job Mummy was doing all the looking.”</p><p>“A very good job,” Grace agreed, snuggling down as Stella brushed her teeth and turned off the lights.</p><p>“Why is Anna all the way over there?”</p><p>“She wanted a change tonight,” Scully yawned. “We’ll move her back tomorrow.”</p><p>“That’s nice,” Grace smiled, fully content.</p><p>She handed her book to Stella, and she began to read.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Requested anonymously on Tumblr: Stella and Scully trying to have a date night at home 8-9 weeks after Anna is born. Chaos ensues.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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